Fear ultimately won in and good old Kent got his nap in I assume. So We take off for the game and I get to thinking about my comments, because I did voice to Tiff the above sentiments, and thought "do I believe that?"dads, are we wired to be pissed off all the time? So I dive into further contemplation and yup...I'm pissed a lot or complaing about something which also equates to the same (being PO'd). Shoot I feel like a younger version of Walter Matthau from Grumpy Old Men at many times. Or maybe more Jack Lemon. Or maybe even Scrooge himself and thus I'm getting weighted down by all these burdensome chains of life.
So why? Is it nature? Is it nurture? Was it a meme I learned from my good ol dad or was the condition learned through trial and error? Meaning it's worked to my benefit being pissed. Try it here. Try it there. In this circumstance and this one. Then I think what could possibly be the benefit? Benefit of them understanding I am still Mustafa. King of this jungle..hear me roar? Encouraging myself that I'm still very much relevant? I'm kind of a big deal. I'm Mr Burgandy?
So stepping back to the soccer game Schtuff, which started this whole train of thought, We get to the field just behind the coach. Most the other boys are then showing up early as usual. We find the field "number..cause there are like 76,000 fields...ticks me off" and proceed to find our spot in the proverbial meandering lines of parents waiting to take claim to their vantage point for the game. Tiff and I then noticed some confusion with our coach, as the boys followed him to the players side of the field. Craig was walking back and forth and finally came back to our end. His comments were at first a bit funny and then yup I was pissed off again. You see we just learned Q's last game was to have been at 10am and not 5pm!! Craig inadvertently switched his two sons game around in the scheduling. Damn! Now his 'last' game is 10am the same morning we were to leave for THE trip. Good grief. Pissed. haha
Craig was visibly and verbally ticked. I had to chuckle. I both resonated and felt pity for him at the same time.
Lol yes he was pissed. He's a dad. Should be.right? Welcome to the club..Dad. Get in line.
Well I'll tell you what. If I act like Jack lemon our entire trip we will certainly hit an iceberg. And just like the character Jack Dawson(ironic huh), I will freeze and drown at the same fricken time. I need to find some inner peace..a better role model. Someone better to emulate. Maybe like Mr. Hand (relaxed "your eating pizza on my time."). Or maybe be more like Richard Simmons, ok not him...he pisses me off. but maybe Dustin Hoffman from meet the fockers, ok not exactly him either. But someone better, more consistently chilled.
Shit the best trips I have ever had in my life were because of intentionally tuning out the noise...the bitching and worrying about all the stuff back in suburbia. Actually being present and ok with it. Even just ok is better than being grumpy all the time! Not .
I know.. I'll do daily affirmations Stewart Smalley -style. Ok right to over the top. But I know this shit. You get back in return what you most think about during your day , ok not in all aspects of life..haha..no I'm not complaing it's all about perspective and energy. Think good. Think Og Mandino- sure it's raining, which could suck, or I could take from it that such a day cleanses my soul. I think I will it that way again. I am getting tired being Scrooge and carrying all these made-up chains in my mind.
7 days and counting. Serenity now.
I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and dog-gone it, people like me! Thanks Mr. Smalley!